We all have those limiting thoughts that play on repeat, creating a cascade of emotions that, in turn, create more limiting thoughts. It's a loop that can keep us stuck unless we intervene. Now, most folks, myself included, tend to tackle the thoughts first. It's like Cognitive Behavioral Therapy 101. You've got to become best friends with your limiting thoughts and then show them the exit door.
Here's a step-by-step guide to help you break free from limiting thoughts
Find those hidden thoughts in past actions
Go back to situations where you wanted to say something but held back. Write them down; it's like creating a "Thoughts I Want to Evict" list. This step is the detective work to catch those limiting thoughts, helping you become aware of them next time they come around.
Interrogate Your Inner Critic
Think about the thoughts that kept you from sharing your opinion and whispered, ‘Nah, better keep quiet’. Identify the self-sabotage - the 'I'll look stupid' or 'Who am I to speak up?' thoughts. Collect them in the jar of self-awareness.
Flip the Narrative
Take those limiting thoughts and flip them like a pancake. ‘They'll think I'm stupid’ becomes ‘My opinion matters, regardless of their thoughts’ or ‘even if they think i’m stupid if I say this, it is important to me to share my opinion’ or ‘my opinion is a valid opinion to share’. You change it into something that makes sense to you.
Become aware of the thoughts in the present
When those situations pop up, don't change a thing (yet). Just be Sherlock and note them down. It's all about catching your thoughts in the act, without judgment. Write down how you would have wanted to react.
Visualize the change
Take your list of past situations and envision how you would have preferred to behave. Play those scenes in your mind. Visualize yourself responding the way you wished. Yes, it might feel like you're auditioning for a role that doesn’t quite fit, but trust the process. Eventually, with enough practice, the role will stop feeling like a performance and will seamlessly integrate into your new self.
Rehearse with Safe Bets
Find understanding pals to practice with. It's like a drama rehearsal with your friend that acts those scenes from your list. Get feedback until your new lines feel like second nature.
Baby Steps into Real Action
Start with the low-hanging fruit. Test your newfound responses in easy-breezy situations where you're confident they'll be embraced, with people you know will accept your newly acquired behavior. Positive feedback is your fuel at this stage.
Unleash Your Altered Behavior
Now, go out there and unleash your new responses like a magic trick. Ta-da! Watch as your world gradually transforms because, surprise, surprise, you just rewired your brain.
Remember, it's a process, not a sprint. So, grab your mental toolkit, buckle up, and let's break free from those limiting thoughts!